Trust, when trusting seems hard.

Jesus, I need to know you are good. Sometimes everything seems to testify against that, like you are absent and you don't care.
I struggle with looking at bad news - a daughter that has been sick for months with seemingly no cure. A faithful man with terminal cancer. A little boy in Africa who has no father and his mother is sick, dying. What is this all about God? I am grieved to the depths of my soul with what feels like endless suffering. You feel so far away sometimes, like maybe you don't care, like you are far removed from our pain, struggle and suffering. I've felt angry at you before, this isn't the first time. It won't be the last.

Then as if the answer erupted straight from your heart I glance across at this message, "Love never fails." If love really never fails then all the pain of this world will somehow be made right. Death will not be the final answer. I will realize that anything good in this world has come straight from your hand and I will stop accusing the One who really does love me and has wanted to make this whole thing right for a very long time. 

The bridge of trust sometimes needs to span a deep, wide chasm, but where have I to go but to you? I beat on your chest with all the hurt and anger and I find those strong arms of yours wrapping around my pain and the answers don't come but you are there. Even though I walk through the darkest valleys, you are with me, you never leave me, you are my strength, my refuge. You know and you care.


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